Self-love

Self-love. It’s a tricky thing, isn’t it?

I’m always wondering why no one teaches children how to love themselves. I remember that I was a pretty shy child but at the same time I loved myself. I thought I was pretty and always right till it came to the point that my mum thought she shouldn’t tell me anymore that I was a pretty one because she thought I would grow up being arrogant. She was not wrong, thinking I was always right isn’t a good thing yet I was just a child.
However, so she stopped telling me this and from my dad I only heard that I should smile and not look so angry all the time. I didn’t receive any kind of words anymore that would make me love myself. I’m a victim of the resting bitch face, I think you all know what that means. So I wasn’t looking angry but I was just not the type of person that would fake a smile, I mean, why should I? It’s not authentic, is it?

When I grew older I wasn’t self-confident at all and no one but some friends ever told me that I was doing well at life or that I was pretty or any kind of that. I felt ugly. I really did because people at school were making fun of my curly hair and of my height (I’m tall for a girl) and everything. I wasn’t a real victim of bullying but when you’re a child or a teenager it’s still not easy to handle comments like this.

I was only 14 years old when I ended up in a toxic relationship with a guy that treated me like his trophy. At first, I felt very beautiful for the first time since I was little but this relationship caused me having PTSD and feeling unworthy and without wanting to blame my parents for all this I’m still wondering what would have happened if I was taught to love myself. Isn’t there any other way to teach your children to love themselves without becoming an arrogant human being? I think there is and I dearly believe that he is highly important.

Lots of people would not end the way they do if they loved themselves. Lots of people would not end up in a toxic relationship if they knew their worth. Lots of people wouldn’t be that much affected by bullying if they knew they’re worthy.

And correct me if I’m wrong but now I think that self-love is the key and the solution to many problems on this actual beautiful place called earth. ย If you love yourself then you do not let people treat you badly, if you love yourself you are more certain that you can actually reach your goals and you get out of your comfort zone. Break-ups would be easier, life, in general, would be easier. To love yourself and to put yourself normally first does not mean being arrogant or selfish. I mean, you are the one who you have to spend the rest of your life with. People come and go, some might stay but you will always have to live with yourself and if you love everyone else but yourself how can you be happy and content with being alone without being lonely?

Please, love yourself. Please teach your children to love themselves. Their life and also yours will be infinitely easier. And with that I don’t want to say love only yourself, sharing is caring but how can you truly love someone else if you don’t love yourself first? You matter you are important, please never forget that and please cut toxic people out of your life.

Love,
Soyadeba

From_the_Ashes_I_Wil_Cover_for_Kindle

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